Hello friends and foes and in-betweens. Welcome to the 3rd annual TJR Halloween special (even though you can't find the previous two ever since the great TJR move of 2012 (also FVF hates me)) where I show you the best, the worst, and the most insane pro-wrestling themed Halloween costumes I could find. Which is harder than you might think. In my search I stumbled across two certainties; the only people that still do nWo themed costumes are frat guys, and there are about 10,000 Undertakers. Anyway, please leave comments below, click the Facebook share button, and Tweet the ever living hell out of this piece. That way I can try to justify typing the words “CM Punk cosplay” and maybe I won’t hate myself.
Anyway, here we go with another 24 of the good, the bad, and the insane pro-wrestling themed costumes. Please try to enjoy.
First let's get this out of the way; that Kane costume is pretty tight, but it's not the reason I selected this photo. There are dozens of Kane cosplay photos I could have chosen from, but none of the others came with a guy that looks like Bobby Lee dressing up like Kurt Angle WITH wig and headgear combo. That's f**king baller, yo.
This Melina costume was so good I actually passed it over a dozen times thinking it was the real deal. I wish it was pre-PG super slutty Melina, but c'est la vie.
I usually don't care for stable themed costumes because usually the majority of the group put some real effort into their costumes and there's always that one asshole that dresses like Carlito or something. But, these nWo cosplayers really brought it, (especially Sting, holy God) even throwing in an Eric Bischoff that looks like a douche and I keep forgetting is there. It's just like real life!
CM Punk is one of the easier costumes to put together; all you need is some athletic tape, a couple of markers, a stocking you can draw tattoos on, and a trip to Hot Topic to get a fake lip ring and that goddamn "Best In the World" shirt. But, very few people online committed to it quite like this guy, who went added CM Punk's pipe-bomb and Jim Halpert face to his costume. Commitment folks. It's important.
The Andre the Giant isn't all that great, but I'm never going to throw shade at a Randy Savage with a classic eagle title belt and embodying the brazen intensity of the Macho Man himself. He just looks so determined.
Rey Mysterio vs. Majin Buu. HOW COULD I NOT LOVE THIS
Here's TJR friend and With Leather Editor Brandon Stroud with his extremely accurate Daniel Bryan costume. He named Team Rhodes Scholars, ya'll! Follow him on Twitter here.
Here's Brandon's girlfriend Destiny completing the Team Hell No themed costume and pulling off the Rule #64 Kane spectacularly. Follow her on Twitter here.
I love this Ultimate Warrior costume, even if he has Batista's silly bellybutton tattoo on his arm.
Oh come on, now this guy is just SHOWING OFF. *Dodges pie, narrowly avoids comically large hook*
There's a veritable GRAVEYARD *ducks, avoids hook again* full of Undertaker/Paul Bearer/Kane cosplay, and while I can appreciate the effort put into this, they committed a fatal flaw when it comes to dressing like the first family of the dead; Paul Bearer should never be as tall or taller than Kane and Undertaker. He looks like he's about to chokeslam both of those emo dicks.
I can appreciate the effort that went into buying a feathered coat and a replica title belt (actually, I really can't), and this might seem like nit-picking, but I'd prefer my Ric Flair to not have reverse Reed Richards hair.
I can't tell if this guy is just a Hardy Boyz fan that wanted to show off his new replica US title belt, or is trying to be Matt Hardy circa 2008, but either way he sould be ashamed of himself.
Remember earlier when I said all it takes is one guy dressing up like Carlito to ruin a good group costume photo? Same goes for Steve "Mongo" McMichael (I don't care if that's who he was intending to be or not, fourth to the right is absolutely Mongo. Eww).
I will never advocate Brooke Hogan cosplay, regardless of how unintentional it might be.
I can see you, Black John Cena, and you're even whiter than the real thing.
Here's the thing, I can get behind even some of the lamest costumes if it looks like there was atleast some effort put into it, but this is pretty goddamn atrocious. If I had to guess I'd say they're dressed as nWo Zack Ryder, ECW's Tiffany, and... I dunno, USA Guy/Derrick Bateman. And it's not even a good half-assed Derrick Batman. If you're going to wear ridiculously tacky pants, you might as well have American flag ones.
I'm not a student of the human mind, but I know it takes a really f**ked up one to include the combination of a 1) Rey Mysterio mask 2) Foam replica spinner belt 3) Blue apron 4) Movie 3D glasses and 5) Bloods neck bandanna and not think it screams mass murderer.
Usually I'd say a rule #64 anything is good, but unlike Destiny's Team Hell No contribution, this female Kane is not awesome but is instead the right amount of nightmare fuel.
I know this is kind of a cheat since it's a store-bought costume, but it actually looks less like Goldberg and more like Peter Dinklage on steroids. Also, where are the eyeholes in that thing? I wonder how many kids who wore that got kidnapped or hit by cars.
My issues isn't that this Goldust costume is bad, because it's not. My issues is that someone would want to dress like Goldust to begin with.
Oh my God, is... is that the Rey Mysterio who fought Majin Buu? Why is he doing this? Is this some kind of POW thing? This is clearly the most disturbing thing I could find on the net. There's no way there's anything possibly more insane...
WHAT THE FU--
For more Halloween treats, check out these Halloween poems Andrew wrote 3 years ago when he was bored.
Tumblr: Andrew Johnson Is A Robot