To which the rest of the world says "Mean Gene's still working? Wait scratch that, Mean Gene is still alive???"
"Mean" Gene Okerlund, who works for WWE on a limited capacity as the host of Vintage Collection and Classics On Demand programming...
WHAT? REALLY? I didn't even know those things existed.
...revealed in an interview with the St. Paul Pioneer Press, that he intends to work for the WWE for at least three more years.
The most astounding thing about this to me is that not only is Mean Gene still an active WWE performer, but that someone actually had the thought "You know who would be a good interview? An old guy from the 80's with a mustache who is on a show nobody watches." That makes sense.
"As long as I can travel," said Okerlund, who is 70-years-old.
He's 70?! Because his mustache doesn't look a day over a 400.
Despite my love of cheesy 80's nostalgia, I've never been that big of a fan of old Mean Gene. I don't know if it's scene chewing haminess, the way he would completly avoid intelligent discussion when he moderated the roundtables on the WWE Legends show, or his total lack of self-awareness, but I've always felt he was the opposite that a WWE broadcaster should be. Then again he was forced to conduct interviews with witch doctors and giant f**king turkeys, so maybe my expectations of professionalism were a little unrealistic.
So good luck Mean Gene. Hope your eventual (real) retirement is as wonderful and enduring as your facial hair.
IN OTHER NEWS
Michelle McCool plans to release a vlog that promises to "break her silence on her marriage to the Undertaker" on her website, michellemccool.net. Justifying nepotism, vlogs, and Michelle McCool; three things I hate. It's like she's telling me directly to f**k right off. (Lords of Pain)
The WWE Network is still about 18 months away from arriving. Coincidentally, so is that can of Dapper Dan I ordered. Well, isn't this place a geographical oddity. (PW Torch)
Shelly Martinez has released a new video entitled "Ooh La La" which is great if you like poorly shot, trashy videos of a girl who's mostly silicon set to Bush songs. Unfortunately it wasn't just a cover for a time traveling Sports Almanac. (ShellyMartinez.org)