This might be news to a lot of you who have only been watching WWE for the past year or so, but Rey Mysterio is actually a full time WWE performer. Unfortunately for Rey though, he has what we in the medical community (okay, they in the medical community) refer to as "shitty knees" (they don't call it that) and has been on the shelf on and off for the past *checks watch* twenty years or so.

Luckily for Mysterio though it looks like his latest injury within the next few months.

Per NoDq:

Rey Mysterio is scheduled to return after the Money In The Bank pay-per-view on July 14th. Mysterio is also advertised for the Raw Australian tour in late July.

The big problem with this announcement is that it's coming from a dirt sheet, and NoDq for the matter, who are perfectly fine with putting up whatever random bit of "news" they read on a forum as fact. According to the dirt sheets Rey Mysterio should have returned about six times since the Royal Rumble. So while I'm not saying this isn't a possibility, I am saying don't hold your breath until you actually hear the BOOYAKA.

The other thing is that Rey is 38 now and has had so many surgeries that he's more-or-less a cyborg at this point. While he can still go when it counts, the fact is that mother nature is catching up with him, and his body frame makes me wonder what the hell his recovery training consists of. Honestly ever since I saw him in that fat kid swimming shirt (which I'm all too familiar with) he started to wear, I can't help but imagine his recovering training consisting of constantly gorging on a giant birthday cake. It's silly and wrong, but it amuses me to think that Rey Mysterio needs to eat cake in order to come back to the WWE. Like this really tall tiered birthday cake, and he's looking up at it with frosting on his gloves and mask and thinking "I'll never finish it."

So if he does come back after MITB like dirt sheets are saying and he's still wearing the fat guy wrestling shirt, he finished the cake.


Kurt Angle spoke with Mark Madden about the problems with TNA booking, mentioning that the company is trying to utilize the younger talent. You know guys like D'Lo Brown, a guy who has been around long enough to not only know what the European Championship was, but actually has held it. (All Wrestling)

Triple H was recently asked which of the members of The Shield he was impressed with the most, and his answer was "Honestly... All of them #realdeal" which is exactly something a mom would say when you know she actually meant Dean Ambrose. (Lords Of Pain)

Jake Roberts recently said his 2014 goal is to not only compete in the Royal Rumble but to win it, which is kind of adorable in a Grandpa forgot to take his brain pills way if you think about it. (Rajah)


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