The Lonestar State of Mind: My PPV SpotThe professional wrestling pay-per-view: an ancient and celebrated tradition in which fans plunk down their hard earned cash to watch an extra special night of wrestling drama. From its humble  beginnings back in the 1980s, wrestling on PPV has expanded exponentially in scale and frequency to the point where today the WWE can broadcast its thirteen scheduled events to dozens of countries around the world. Believe it or not that’s actually a decrease from 2006’s sixteen events but at over 40 American Dollars a pop (in standard definition) that’s still a lot of money to spend on wrestling! For understandable reasons some wrestling fans either skip most PPVs or find a less costly way to tune in.<!--more-->Personally I don’t buy that many WWE PPVs and up until last month’s Royal Rumble I had never seen one live. I’m not really in the financial position to spend much money on a quick bit of entertainment every month but I will occasionally shill out and watch from home when I think it’s important, namely for C M Punk and Money In the Bank 2011. Instead I often go the cheaper route by watching PPVs at a local sports-bar with a friend and fellow wrestling fan. Sure it’s not as comfortable as sitting in your basement by yourself in your underwear and an old-ass Batista t-shirt, but it definitely is more affordable.

My PPV buddy and I use a Show-Me’s as our traditional PPV viewing location, mostly because it’s the only option around. For those of you that don’t know, Show-Me’s has all the characteristics of a third-rate Hooters: the food is lousy, the service is terrible, the actual building seems to be falling apart and the skimpily dressed waitresses are usually not so bright. I think we’ve had one experience where we felt that the woman waiting on us was exhibiting good customer service and you better believe we gave her a substantial tip for doing so. Usually our waitress either messes up our order or skulks the entire evening, which isn’t so great when you’re stuck with her for three-plus hours.

[caption id="attachment_5372" align="aligncenter" width="512" caption="The Show Me's crew from my actual location. I've never seen them before and I'm pretty sure they don't exist."][/caption]On top of all that the establishment as a whole seems to resent that they have to cater to wrestling fans in the first place. When we go watch the PPV there are certain rules that we have to follow that are different than if we had come in to watch a baseball or football game. Wrestling fans have to make at least a ten dollar purchase (which is understandable), cannot split checks, and are usually relegated to the outside patio to watch the PPV. Needless to say, it gets cold. Sometimes a bartender or a waitress will also spend the entire show making fun of it, which is about the last thing you’d want while watching professional wrestling. Imagine a skanky blonde thinking she’s Chelsea Handler while you watch a big main-event match and you’ve pretty much got the idea.So why do we put up with all the inconveniences, you ask? Well, besides paying only 10 bucks for dinner and a WWE PPV there’s a certain unique atmosphere that exists only when watching professional wrestling while surrounded by other wrestling fans. We go for the moments when the entire place erupts in noise as the popular baby-face scores the pinfall or when one wrestler smacks another upside the head with a stiff kick. We go for the little kid, whose absolute favorite wrestler is Randy Orton, sitting excitably at a table with his dad and the reaction that kid makes when his home-town hero beats the bad guy. We go for the incredibly fat guy in the DX shirt, the tough-looking dude who marks out over his favorite undersized wrestler, and the girlfriend who’s along for the ride but secretly likes it anyway. Basically we put up with the bullshit because it’s wrestling fans watching wrestling; overpriced chicken rangoons are the small price we pay to get that experience.What’s your PPV routine? Do you buy them all no matter what? Are you one of those lucky English bastards who get some shows for free as part of your cable package? Sound off in the comment section below and let us know.Twitter.com/LonestarTJRLonestarTJR@gmail.com