Have you ever wondered while watching Game Of Thrones, how those characters would fair in the WWE. Watching “The King of Kings” Triple H make power moves worthy of King’s Landing on WWE TV makes the narrative universe’s that these two programs exist in seem more similar than they would first appear. No there isn’t murder and explicit sex/violence in the WWE, but there is backstabbing, plotting, and political trickery afoot on each episode of Monday Night Raw, much like there is every Sunday night during Game Of Thrones.
The more you think about it, many of the characters we’ve come to know, love, and loathe in Westeros have WWE Superstars that they share several traits with. A counterpart cut from the same cloth within another, wildly exciting but altogether vastly different narrative structure. That being said it’s still fun to speculate whom some of the WWE’s superstar’s Game Of Thrones parallels are.
This week, I’ll look at twelve characters in the WWE that resemble, to varying degrees, some of the players involved in Game Of Thrones. We can see which characters are matches, and what about them is so similar. I think it will be a fun exercise to undertake and hope everyone gets a kick out of it. Let’s Rock and/or Roll!
**** Warning! Game Of Thrones Spoilers Ahead. You’ve been warned! ****
Stephanie McMahon/Cersei Lannister
Cersei Lannister is a complicated character, one who is fierce and lacks any empathy, but is easily overcome by her emotions. She witnesses the tossing of a young boy out of the window of a tower without batting an eyelash, and has even voiced her desire for her brother Tyrion to be killed. She wants to be as calculated as her father, but is often undone by her emotions, most recently having been jealousy that her son was being married away, and rage/sadness at her son’s death. Her inability to check her emotions at the door in her dealings is a huge weakness, but her ruthless nature, depravity, and resources keep her a dangerous and strong player in Westeros. In many respects, sleeping with her brother of course aside, Stephanie McMahon very much resembles Cersei.
Stephanie is fiercely protective of her husband, and the business that her family built. Her character tries very hard to be like her father in the way that she runs the business, but she can often be undone by her extreme emotions, anger more often than not. Her temper got her in trouble last year when dealing with Big Show, and could have lost her everything had Big Show not been a moron. Her ability to emasculate and humiliate those around her, like Big Show, Daniel Bryan and even Randy Orton and Batista without any remorse is borderline sociopathic. Also the way she seemingly takes a primal pleasure in watching her husband inflict violence onto others is certainly an alarming and frightening trait for someone with as much power as she wields. She is deceitful and truly wicked, all traits that make Stephanie McMahon and Cersei Lannister kindred spirits.
Triple H/Tywin Lannister
Calculating, cerebral, morally obtuse. These are just some of the words one would use to describe Tywin Lannister, patriarch of the Lannister family, along with maybe evil, manipulative, selfish and powerful. His power derives from his ability to position himself politically. He stays calm in the face of adversity, always managing to turn negative circumstances into a positive development for himself and his family. His power is not his sword, though he does have several skilled fighters that are willing to battle at his behest. Influence is Tywin’s biggest strength. He has his fingers in everybody’s business and seemingly unlimited resources. He first tries to befriend his enemies, and if that tactic bears no fruit he eliminates them from the equation by any means necessary. Remind you of anyone?
Triple H is the Tywin Lannister of the WWE. Known as The Cerebral Assassin and The Game, Triple H much like Tywin Lannister is regarded as a master politician and strategist. Like Tywin his power truly derives from his influence within the WWE, and like Tywin his first instinct is to make his enemy his friend, as he attempted to do just before things broke down between The Shield and The Authority/Evolution. Triple H, like Tywin is also not afraid to use what most would consider unsavory and immoral tactics, like lying, cheating, stealing, or organizing the murder of a hundreds of people including a pregnant woman and her child thus breaking the sacred law of Guest Right. Okay, that last one was Tywin, but beating Daniel Bryan nearly to death while he’s handcuffed has to be as close to the Red Wedding the WWE can get, right?
John Cena/Jon Snow
Jon Snow, one of the most important characters in the Game Of Thrones series, is considered by many to be one of the plainest characters in the series as well. He is a very loyal member of the Night’s Watch, and takes his vows more seriously than most of his fellow Crows. He believes in doing what is right and what is moral, and rarely if ever deviates from his strict boy scout sensibilities, making him one of, if not the most straightforward characters in Westeros. Jon Snow is a good guy through and through and isn’t posturing or trying to position himself to amass power. He is very similar to John Cena both in his sensibilities, and how people react to his milquetoast personality.
John Cena is maligned because his character has become bland. It doesn’t help that people are more tired than ever of the kind of hero that John Cena (and Jon Snow) are. People these days like it when their heroes break the rules whilst being heroic. They like it when their heroes don’t rigidly abide by the ideals that both John Cena and Jon Snow hold dear. Both John Cena and Jon Snow want to do their best to serve those that they have pledged allegiance to in the most moral and straightforward ways possible.
Jon Snow’s view of things and naivety don’t mesh with his surroundings and it is a struggle to stay true to them, while the WWE Universe he tries to be an example for challenges Cena’s ideals. While their preachy attitudes and naïve idealism may from time to time annoy us, both guys are compassionate and simple people whose ideals are necessary within their narratives, whether or not people want to admit it. Every narrative needs a moral compass.
Is there any character on television that represents bad ass kids better than Arya Stark (nobody better try saying Carl Grimes!)? Not only was she trained by one of the greatest Game Of Thrones characters of all time (Syrio Forel of Braavos), but she has turned the slaughter of her family (her Father, Mother, and Brother were all killed at the hands of the Lannisters) into motivation as she hopes to one day go on a vengeful killing spree of her own. From the first day she appeared on the program, yearning to fight rather than dreaming of being someone’s wife and other girly endeavors, we all knew that Arya was going to be a certified bad ass, and her current adventures with “The Hound” are only increasing her stock. Is there anybody that resembles in the WWE today?
Paige, like Arya in Game Of Thrones, has reminded us that women in the WWE can be tough, skilled competitors. Paige is driven by her desire to live up to her wrestling heritage (her whole family are wrestlers), and aided by the enthusiasm for competition that only youth can provide. Just like Arya, from the moment she arrived on the scene we all knew that Paige was kind of a big deal and she has gone on to prove that in recent weeks.
Paige’s aggressive style in the ring as well as her modified scorpion crosslock submission make her stand out more than half the guys on the roster, in the same way that Arya’s toughness and determination make her stand out among the members of the Stark family. Both Arya and Paige bring a youthful exuberance, naivety, and confidence to universes where female characters are for the most part seen as props (and in the WWE’s case, completely devalued).
Kane/Gregor “The Mountain” Clegane
The atrocities that Gregor Clegane has committed in Westeros are known all across the realm, and the man known as The Mountain for his imposing physical stature, might just be the most feared man in Westeros. The fear he instills in people isn’t that of political power, but rather that of complete and utter depravity. The Mountain has no regard for anything or anyone. This is a man who burned his younger brother Sandor’s face as a child, a man responsible for countless rapes and murders I Westeros, and a man who publicaly beheaded his own horse after he failed to taste victory in a joust. The man’s own brother Sandor Clegane wants nothing more than to kill The Mountain by his own sword. Gregor Clegane is a feral animal that can seemingly only be controlled by Tywin Lannister.
Similarly Kane has quite the rap sheet in the WWE. He has performed countless disgusting acts, including but not limited to burning his peers, electrocuting his boss’ balls, very likely forcing Lita into sleeping with him (though this was never seen), and the numerous attempted murders of his brother The Undertaker. Furthermore, Kane is now a puppet of The Authority, who much like Tywin Lannister seem to be the only ones capable of corralling the Devil’s Favorite Demon. When it comes to rap sheets, I have to say that Kane’s is uncomfortably similar to that of his Westeros counterpart, Gregor “The Mountain” Clegane. If Kane were to somehow find himself in Westeros, The Mountain just may become the second scariest man in the realm.
Randy Orton/Joffrey Baratheon
Joffrey Baratheon is a spoiled brat; entitled in every sense of the word. Joffrey does as he pleases and thinks very little of anyone. He is disrespectful to those beneath him, often dismissive of his allies, boastful having done nothing but be born into the royal bloodline and is ignorant to the reality of the world he lives in. These are all the traits of an incredibly loathsome person, but when you realize Joffrey is a psychopath that relishes in violence and inflicting pain on others, he becomes more than a spoiled brat. Joffrey is an insufferable force of evil, with the power through birthright to act on his sadistic nature without consequence. If anybody in the WWE resembles Joffrey, it is Randy Orton.
Randy Orton was born into the wrestling business; he is a third generation wrestler and came into the WWE highly regarded. He ascended to the top of the WWE quickly and paid little to no dues during his climb to the top of the mountain. He feels he was born for this and that he doesn’t have to work as hard as those around him. He expects things to be handed to him, and for the better part of late 2013 and early 2014, they were. What’s worse is that he has the backing of the COO Triple H and Stephanie McMahon. He can do no wrong, and is free to act on any whim. This all sounds too familiar right?
While not quite as vicious or inbred as Joffrey, Randy Orton is a spoiled brat who is known to be a callous, somewhat dimwitted sadist, Randy like Joffrey is so easily hateable, and might be the best villain in his narrative because not only do you hate him, you don’t respect him as a character.
Dean Ambrose/Petyr “Littlefinger” Baelish
Everything you need to know about Petyr Baelish can be summed up in his belief that Chaos is a Ladder. Littlefinger, as he’s often called, always capitalizes on chaos. He thrives in its uncertainty and almost always comes out on the other side of it with more power and influence than he had before. Littlefinger is one of the least loyal men in Westeros, as evidenced in the most recent episode of Thrones where it is revealed that he had at least some involvement in the poisoning of Joffrey, whom he had sworn allegiance to. Littlefinger is always looking out for his own interests. He’s untrustworthy, yet charismatic and manipulative enough to make you want/need to trust him. Only Dean Ambrose can match Petyr Baelish’s combination of intelligence and unpredictability.
To say Dean Ambrose is a little unhinged is an understatement. The guy is chaotic and it comes across in the way he speaks and wrestles. Of the members of The Shield, I say that he benefits the most from the anarchy that inevitably ensues during any of their battles. He is the one Hound of Justice that is hardest to trust, because he’s impossible to read. Would he do anything for his Shield brethren, or is he only doing so now because it’s to his benefit? We saw how easily he turned on The Authority?
It’s very possible that Dean is an agent of chaos that will ride the turmoil that he creates to the top of the WWE. It wouldn’t be a surprise to find out that like Littlefinger, Dean Ambrose is only truly concerned about Dean Ambrose, and will do whatever he needs to, befriend whoever he needs to and eliminate whomever he needs to, to further his interests. It’s just a matter of timing.
Bronn, Tyrion’s bodyguard and trusted confidant, is a well-regarded sell sword and brilliant tactical combatant. While his fighting skills are renowned, it is ironically brains that make Bronn such a dangerous and valuable commodity. While most find his covetous nature off-putting, he can always be trusted at the right price, which is more than can be said of most in Game of Thrones. He is also very charming, charismatic and witty, as his banter with Tyrion would prove. His style of fighting, which has proven very effective, relies heavily on speed. He dodges most of his enemy’s attacks rather that absorbing them with a shield or armor. His superior stamina and intellect have yet to fail him, which goes to prove that he is one of the most skilled and exciting warriors in the realm.
Like Bronn, Seth Rollins is a brilliant tactician. Referred to as the Architect of The Shield, he is the brains behind their operations. He presumably creates their gameplans, keeps everyone on the same page, and is always calculating the best move for the trio to make in any given combat situation. His style of fighting is also similar to Bronn’s, relying mostly on speed, well placed strikes, unorthodox aerial maneuvers, and seemingly endless stamina. Seth’s ability to remain energized is one of his biggest advantages in the ring, and he most certainly uses it for all it’s worth. Furthermore, for a large portion of his career, Seth Rollins, as well as his brothers in arms The Shield, were mercenaries for hire, and have acted on behalf of Paul Heyman, CM Punk, and The Authority, before going into business for themselves recently. Bronn and Seth Rollins are cut from the same cloth, and both tend to steal their respective shows when given the opportunity to shine.
Roman Reigns/”The Hound” Sandor Clegane
Sandor Clegane, often referred to as “The Hound” is one of Westeros’ most physically imposing characters. He is one of the greatest fighters in all of Westeros, incredibly loyal to those who earn his loyalty, and bound by a code and his own form of justice. He served for many years as Prince Joffrey’s personal bodyguard and servant, but was often disrespected by the psychopathic Prince who would later become King. He held a quiet disdain for the hypocrisy of Knighthood, the lying and political posturing in entailed, while often displaying acts of bravery that included saving young princess Sansa Stark from an angry mob. Sandor eventually deserted King’s Landing, and renounced King Joffrey and The Knighthood to go into business for himself. In many respects I find The Hound to be very similar to Shield member Roman Reigns.
Not only is Roman Reigns a Hound himself (Hound Of Justice that is), he too is one of the WWE’s most physically imposing superstars. Nobody wants to be at the receiving end of his famed Superman Punch or Spear. Roman Reigns is also fiercely loyal to his Shield brethren, and will stand with them even when facing insurmountable odds. Reigns was also one of the bodyguards for The Authority and Randy Orton, before becoming disenchanted with them and now fighting against them along with Seth Rollins and Dean Ambrose. Roman even had a great showing in the WWE’s annual Royal Rumble event this year much like Sandor did at the Tournament for King Joffrey’s Nameday, when Sandor saved the champion from his beastly brother and had his own hand raised as in front of the cheering onlookers. Roman Reigns and Sandor Clegane are more similar than they are different, and both are certainly bad asses in their domains.
That’s right, a cross-gender comparison of character. When you really compare and contrast Bray Wyatt and Melisandre, you find that one of the only differences between the two is their gender. Melisandre, Priestess of The Lord of Light, has preached and increased the influence of her widely dismissed deity in Westeros. She is an advisor to Stannis Baratheon who has laid claim to the Iron Throne, and seems to possess otherworldly powers including the ability to see prophesies of the future, curse the others who would lay claim to the Iron Throne, and summon otherworldly beings. More incredible is her ability to pull people into her fold and have them renounce the old gods in favor of the Lord of Light.
Bray Wyatt preaches about a new way of life and encourages the WWE Universe, as well as anybody else willing to renounce the old pillars of the WWE (Cena, Orton, etc.) and bring about a new world order. His charisma, and the fact that what he speaks of is intoxicating in its legitimacy, has large sects of the WWE Universe eating out of the palm of his hand. Tired of the old ways, many fans want to see change, and many believe that Bray is the talented, enigmatic harbinger of change.
Like Melisandre, his influence grows and his ability to capture or instill fear in the hearts of his opponents and allies alike make him a powerful player. The power he yields is hard to understand, but he fancies himself the prophet, the man that will cause us to renounce our heroes, and the eater of the world as we know it; and who’s to say he’s wrong at this point. There is no closer comparison in Game of Thrones for Bray Wyatt other than The Red Woman.
This comparison might be a little controversial, and is admittedly a bit of a stretch. On first glance, it’s hard to spot how Jaime Lannister resembles Batista, but there are a few key similarities. Jaime Lannister is somewhat of a celebrity in Westeros, having been the youngest ever member of the Kingsguard. He is also infamous for his betrayal of the Mad King Aerys Targaryen, which fostered the derogatory nickname “Kingslayer”. Jaime is also for all intents and purposes a bit of an a$$#@!*, having pushed a child out a window to hide his incestuous affair with his sister (and then queen) Cersei. As unredeemable as this seems, Jaime is quite charming, and despite his many flaws, he is pretty affable, when he’s not forcing himself onto his sister in their dead son’s crypt.
What does any of this have to do with Batista? Well, Batista like Jaime is a bit of a celebrity, given that he is one of the stars of Marvel’s Guardians of the Galaxy. He also has several infamous backstage incidents, including losing a fight with Booker T, as well as sleeping with several Divas. Furthermore, for all intents and purposes, Batista’s character is a greedy, self-absorbed douchebag, who is more concerned with making money and piling accolades rather than being liked. He’s also kind of cool when he’s being a dick to people, and you find yourself digging Bootista more than you rightfully should.
Batista and Jaime tried to turn new leafs upon their returns, Batista to WWE and Jaime to King’s Landing, but eventually fell back into old habits. Finally Batista, having never lost to Triple H can be considered a Kingslayer in his own right. These guys have a lot more in common than one would assume upon first glance.
Daniel Bryan/Tyrion Lannister
Tyrion Lannister possesses great intelligence, an affable personality as well as the heart of a lion. People may be fooled by his small stature, but Tyrion is a powerful player in Westeros. He is incredibly clever and has been a fan favorite since the beginning of the Game Of Thrones series, due largely to his unyielding wit and what we would later discover was incredible bravery and tactical brilliance. Is there any questioning that Daniel Bryan is the WWE’s Tyrion Lannister? Minus the whoring and incessant drinking of course.
Often overlooked because of his size, disrespected by those in power despite time and time again proving his worth, Tyrion and Daniel’s stories are frighteningly similar. Daniel Bryan has to fight twice as hard to get people to respect him, shows more heart and bravery than most of the people that continually put him down and attempt to humiliate him, and has captured the hearts of the viewers at home and in attendance. Sounds familiar, right?
Daniel Bryan’s boss Triple H openly despises him, much like Tyrion’s father Tywin openly despises Tyrion. Those more open-minded in the WWE can see Daniel Bryan’s worth, and the same can be said about the people of Westeros that can see beyond Tyrion being “The Imp”. Both Daniel Bryan and Tyrion Lannister must shoulder heavy burdens, put on them because the people around them can’t overlook their stature and see that within them both beats the heart of a champion. Both overcome the prejudice and obstacles, proving to be power players in their respective universes, while continuing to fight the power that wants to see them brought down.
There you have it, but as always I want to know what you think! Are my parallels fair? Which ones work and which ones don't? Are there more parallels between these two universes? What other GoT characters would you say parallel WWE Superstars?
Until next time folks, I'm Matty J. Douglas saying Go Spurs Go! And thank you Clippers for extending your series with the OKC Thunder! Have a great week everybody!